Whole30, Day 27 -- one goal reached!

So it's day 27 of this round's whole30 challenge.  things are going pretty much as they did before -- i feel good.   i am sleeping better.  not a whole lot more energy, but that is just me.  and the biggie -- i have lost weight!  according to the rules of the whole30 challenge, participants are not supposed to weigh themselves during the month, but i cheated.  i wanted to see if i had lost any of the weight i gained over the holidays, so i have weighed myself a couple of times this month.  the good news -- as of today i have lost ALL the weight i gained over the holidays!!! i had gained -- gasp!-- 9 pounds and they are now gone!!!!!! not bad i think, but it would have been better if i had not gained weight at all!! i have worked too hard to go back to where i was, and i have more work ahead of me to reach my final goal weight.

i want to say that i am so proud of my 13 year old son, who has been doing the challenge with my husband and i.  with the exception of butter, chocolate milk, his grain free breakfast waffles with maple syrup and a bit of rice during the month, he has done just about everything else according to plan.  he has been taking his lunch to school, and likes it.  he also is eating almonds for a snack, something i couldn't get him to do before.  he has also grown almost an inch during the month.  he is also calmer and less argumentative.  being that he is 13, however, i don't expect that to last! lol!!  anyway, he has done great, and we will be easing some of his restrictions a bit when the month is over.  i have told him i want him to stay away from wheat as much as possible, but i will let him have school lunch pizza once a week.  i know it is not great for him, but it is one thing i am willing to give on a little.

so, there is the update.  i will leave you with a photo of what we had for dinner tonight -- surf and turf! grass fed new york steak, steamer clams in a broth of clam juice, chicken stock and carmelized onions with garlic, sauteed scallops and mixed roasted veggies (broccoli, carrots, mushrooms, and  turnips). it was yummy!!

Day 1, whole30 round 3

most people started their january whole30 yesterday -- we chose to wait one more day and started ours today.  my husband got up and did his exercises and walk.  i did not.  he said he even tried to wake me up by shaking my foot, but i felt nothing!! i must have been really tired.  when i did finally get up, i just felt off, and have felt like that all day.  i am not really sure why.  i did ok with my eating, but i just feel very uncomfortable.  thankfully my husband fixed most of the dinner, so all i had to do was make a salad and cut up some veggies and fruit.  we are doing something a bit different this time -- in our past whole30 months, we made some extra non paleo side dishes for our kids. this time, we will not be doing that so much, as we want to see if our 13 year old son will benefit from further changes to his diet.  he has been a good sport about things as we have changed our diet over the past 2 years, but he has stubbornly resisted some facets of paleo eating.  for this round, he has agreed to give up sweets and grains, which is huge for him.  his sweet tooth is worse than mine. i have let him keep his daily glass of chocolate milk and since he doesn't like eggs he will also get to eat waffles for breakfast, but i make them from my own grain free recipe. thankfully he likes meat and chicken and fruits and veggies, so my main challenge will be keeping him full.  at 13, he is growing and eating like crazy!

so, for my eating today, i had an aidell's chicken apple sausage (whole30 compliant with no sugar and no preservatives added) and a banana for breakfast.  for lunch i had a couple of hard boiled eggs and an orange.  for my afternoon snack i ate a little more than an ounce of dry roasted almonds and some dried cranberries (no sugar added).  for dinner i ate 2 roasted chicken thighs (roasted with the skin on but i took the skin off before i ate them), some roasted vegetables, salad and an apple.  my total calories came to 1490, with 44% of calories from fat, 22% from protein and 35% from carbs.  i also exceeded my daily fiber goal -- daily goal is 25 grams of fiber, and today i took in 28.6 grams.  my only exercise came from grocery shopping and climbing stairs.  tomorrow will be different -- i hope!!

HERE is nom nom paleo's post of the day -- today she shows us how to make homemade mayonnaise.  i have not tried it yet, but i need to because my husband likes salad dressing, and most commercially made dressings have non-compliant ingredients in them.

it is time for bed now -- i hope i feel better tomorrow!!

New Year, New Start, Same Goals

happy 2013!!!  i am really looking forward to this year!  to me, the new year is a chance for a fresh start, a time for continuing the advances made the previous year and for setting new, attainable goals for the months ahead.  i didn't used to feel this way.  in years past, i wished for time to stand still; i was fearful of what lay ahead -- that it might be worse than what i had just come through.  this year, for some reason, i don't feel that way.  i feel a sense of anticipation -- and i couldn't really voice that until just this moment!  so, join me on this journey through the year of our Lord, 2013 . . . a spirit of  promise and hope is in the air!

on my journey to wellness, i have made many changes over the past two years. i reached a milestone of 50 pounds of weight lost.  i have exercised more. i have removed most grains from my diet most of the time.  i stopped drinking soda pop.  that was a big one for me, as i love soda.  of all the changes i have made, that was the hardest, and really, soda is the one thing i wish i didn't have to give up -- i don't miss bread or pasta; i miss my pepsi and mountain dew. 

this journey, however, is not finished.  i still have far to go.  i still eat foods that are not healthy.  i don't sleep enough. i worry too much.  yes, it's true, i am not perfect!  (shhh -- don't tell my husband or kids! lol!!)   even so, i am happy with the way my life has improved since changing my diet and getting healthier, and that will continue to be an important part of how i live each day this year.

my husband and i have decided to do another whole30 paleo challenge this month, to start the new year and reset our metabolism after the indulgences of the holidays.  we both chose to relax the restrictions on the food we ate over the past 6 weeks or so, and we are now seeing the results.  although we aren't surprised by some weight gain, we are reminded once again that being healthy requires daily diligence in both our diet and our activity.  so . . . is anyone else up for the challenge?  HERE is the whole30 website that helps explain the whole30 challenge.  make no mistake -- it is a challenge, but it is totally doable and so worth it!


during this whole30 challenge, i will also be reading one of my favorite paleo blogs,  nom nom paleo .  the author's name is michelle, and she makes great meals and posts wonderful pictures documenting how she and her family live the paleo lifestyle.  during the month of january, she will be posting about the whole30 challenge and i guarantee it will help you if you decide to follow along.

i will leave you with a recipe that i tried recently and loved!! if you like curry, you will love this too! if you don't like curry, well, this recipe just might change your mind.

MADRAS CURRY SAUCE

1 stick butter (8 tablespoons) 2 large onions, finely chopped 3 large cloves garlic, finely minced 2 carrots, finely chopped 2 chili peppers (see below) 2 apples, chopped 1 3/4 cups chicken broth 1-2 tablespoons Madras curry powder 3/4 cup coconut milk This is a simple curry sauce which can be easily prepared by chopping and/or mincing the ingredients in the food processor. A blender may also be used if the vegetables are chopped briefly in a blender filled with cold water.Using gloves, remove seeds from the chili peppers and soak for 30 minutes in warm water; drain and chop. Melt the butter in a skillet; saute the onions, garlic and carrots, without browning, but just until they take on a toasted color around the edges. The best way to avoid over-browning the garlic is to add it in near the end, when the onions have already begun to brown. Wash and core apples, leaving on most of the peel. Coarsely chop and add to the skillet. Cover and simmer for 15-20 minutes over low heat. Add chicken broth. Cover and simmer for 45-60 minutes. Add 1-2 tablespoons Madras curry powder, a teaspoon of sea salt or to taste and 1/2 teaspoon freshly grated ginger root (don't use ground; use real ginger root). Add coconut milk; use slightly less if a thicker sauce is desired. Bring to a boil for one minute; remove from heat. Serve with any meat or fish desired. Taste and adjust seasonings. Serve with rice, if desired. (from cooks.com)

for my version i changed things up just a bit -- i substituted coconut oil for the butter, i left out the garlic, i did not use whole chili peppers; instead i used about a teaspoon of chili powder and sprinkled some dried red chili pepper over the mix.  i did use 2 apples, but i removed the peel and finely chopped them, and added them after the onions had softened up a bit.  regarding the coconut milk, we are talking full fat, canned coconut milk.  you will need to stir the solids that have risen to the top of the can back into the liquid contents.  then measure out 3/4 cup.  it also doesn't take 45-60 minutes of simmering if you don't want it to.  the best news?  it is whole30 compliant!  no added sugars, no diary (if you substitute coconut oil for butter as i did) and leave out the rice. just read the labels on your coconut milk and chicken broth to make sure there are no preservatives, etc.  this sauce would be good with any protein -- i made it this time with fresh (from frozen) tuna steaks that had been cut into about 1" medallions.  i then poured the hot sauce over the tuna in an oven safe baking dish and baked it for about 14 minutes in a 350 degree oven.enjoy!!

home away from home

from the time i was a little girl, i have loved the beach.  the ocean, the sand, the horizon, the smells, the freshness, the roar of the waves, the uniqueness -- it all speaks to me in a way no other place on earth can.  i have been lucky enough to live my entire life where in less than two hours, i can go from sitting in front of a computer to digging my toes into the sand. 

i have family members who own property at the coast, and over the years they have been generous enough to let us use their homes on occasion.  my dream, however, was to have a home of my own at the beach. it was something i never thought would happen, but i never lost sight of the dream.  about 15 years ago, a family friend contacted us and offered us the use of his house at the coast.  he gave us a set of keys and said it was ours to use any time; all we had to do was call and find out if anyone else was using the place at the same time we wanted it.  if it was not otherwise occupied, we could use it.  we began to go, occasionally at first, then more frequently.  except for our friend, it seemed that the rest of his family didn't use it much, so we had access to the house almost any time we wanted.  during our visits over the next couple of years, we began to explore the area where the house was located, on washington's long beach peninsula, and grew to love it.

about 2 years after we first started using the house, our friend called my husband and said that because of his advanced age (90+) he had decided that he wouldn't be using the home anymore, and that no one in his family wanted to take it over.  he wanted to know if we would be interested in buying it.  when my husband called and asked me, i said . . . "DO YOU EVEN HAVE TO ASK ME THAT QUESTION??????????!!!"

of course, my response was an enthusiastic YES!  it took a bit of doing, and in the process of working out the details, our friend passed away, but his family went through with the sale at the agreed upon price and in 2002 we came into possession of what had always been  my dream: a home at the coast!!

it is a small house, and it doesn't have a view of the ocean, but i don't care!  in the summer when the windows are open, we can hear the waves.  it is an easy 2 mile walk to the beach. there is no cable or satellite, just a tv that is hooked up to a vcr and a dvd player. no internet. we do get cell service, but there is no land line.  it truly is a place for relaxing.  my husband goes up and fishes almost every weekend during the summer.  i am able to get away by myself occasionally, and there have been weekends where i have not left the house once (except to go on a walk). 

every time i go to our home away from home, i say a little prayer when i get there and when i leave: "thank you God for this place of rest, for allowing me to have my heart's desire.  for as long as we have it i thank you, and i pray it will always be a place of refreshment and restoration for all who come here."


i am a blessed woman.


here are a few pictures of our home away from home:

                                          front view of the house

                                           

                            view looking from bedrooms toward living area

                                           kitchen 

                                              bathroom

                                 view of living area from kitchen

                             view upon entering house -- giant fireplace!!

                                         guest bedroom

                                         master bedroom

i'm baaaack --- again!

so it looks like i fell off the blogging wagon for a few months!! not totally intentional, but when reading back over my last post, it appears i was feeling frustrated about some things i was experiencing. when i get like that, i tend to retreat back into myself. i didn't really want to share every detail about my difficulties.  i am a pretty private person -- even on facebook, i try to be positive and upbeat in my posts, yet not too personal.  the problem is, i don't always feel positive and upbeat.  i get tired, angry, annoyed and frustrated.  in short, i am a human being!  i have several blogs i read regularly, and some of them seem to only post funny, entertaining stories about themselves and their families.  others post all about the shortcomings and struggles in their daily lives.  i have decided it doesn't have to be totally one way or the other.  i am the author of this blog.  i am the one who decides what i want to write, whether it is about my diet, my family, something personal, or not so personal.

that being said, here is a brief update -- we had a nice summer -- once our summer weather finally arrived!  we went to our cabin on the coast a lot, and the weather there was fantastic almost every weekend we were there!  i continued to work part-time at our auto body repair facility, and i tried to balance that with some time at home.  in august, i returned to my part-time school portrait photographer job, only it hasn't been part-time -- i have been steadily working 40 hours a week or more, while still trying to fit in a few hours at the shop.  i am thankful for the income though!

we are still eating a mostly paleo diet -- we did another whole30 challenge in september, and even though i felt well and my clothes got a bit looser, i didn't lose nearly the pounds that i did in april -- then i lost 11 lbs, this time i only lost 3 lbs!! the good news is that 3 lbs put me at the long awaited total of 50 lbs lost since january of 2010.  wooo hoooo!!!! the only difference i could see between april when we did our first whole 30 and september is that i was not doing the amount of concentrated exercise that i was doing in april.  my photography job has been taking me out the door at 5 or 6 am almost every day, and that is usually my exercise time.  i am getting some exercise by setting up and tearing down my camera equipment, and by standing all day, but i am not getting in the weight training and walking and bike riding i was doing earlier in the year.  come december when my fall photography season is over, i will re-enter the exercise world with a vengeance.

i have been really good about being grain free almost all the time -- just few instances with corn and rice.  i am really trying to avoid wheat, and have been mostly successful with that (with just a couple of exceptions).  i have refined my waffle recipe and a couple of muffin recipes to be made with a combo of coconut, almond and quinoa flour, and they are good enough that my husband and 13 year old really like them.  in fact, i didn't tell my 13 year old that they were wheat free until after i had made them that way at least twice, and he smacked his lips and asked for more each time!! he was very surprised when i told him they were grain free, but he finally admitted that they were good enough that he didn't mind if i made them that way all the time!! i haven't gotten him totally off wheat yet, but he has come a long way!! it doesn't help that his big sister is a pastry chef, and i will confess i have indulged in a couple of her decidedly non-paleo treats recently!

that is a brief update -- i will make a renewed effort to continue blogging more consistently.  it may not be always about my diet or my exercise. i may decide to get personal on occasion. maybe i will even find a way to be mildly entertaining -- but i have found that putting my thoughts in writing does somehow help me to think more clearly, and that is a positive thing for everyone who knows me!

i have been feeling a bit moody lately.  this is the 3rd time i have tried writing this post, and i have made numerous changes every time.  seriously, i just could not decide what to write.


earlier this month i was really concentrating on getting back on track after gaining some weight and the numbers on the scale started to move back down.  then, i became distracted, made some bad food choices and now am back where i started at the beginning of june.  

it is very difficult for me to not be hard on myself when i fall short of the expectations i have set.  i don't necessarily think they are unrealistic (most of the time) but i do become very critical when i fail to accomplish my goals.  it becomes very self defeating, and i struggle with that a lot.  i tend to lose sight of what i HAVE accomplished, and i focus more on my perception that others have succeeded where i have failed.

life is not a constant stream of successes, though.  what i am beginning to grasp is that even when there is a perceived failure to meet an expectation, be it realistic or not, there is an opportunity for learning.  i have learned which foods are healthy and which are not.  i have found that i need to exercise both my body and my mind.  i learned many years ago that i need to eat breakfast, and that my breakfast must include protein.  i have known for a long time that my sugar intake can quickly spiral out of control.  i have no problem giving up grains or beans, and i can even live without dairy.  sugar, however, in one form or another, is the thing that seems to sneak in when even when i am trying my hardest.  

i think what happened is that i gave myself permission to eat some treats after my month of total sugar abstinence.  it was the first time in my life i had ever gone that long without sugar, and i was amazed that my sugar cravings were pretty much gone.  i felt like i would finally be able to have a reasonable treat, then be done, without triggering that feeling of "i need more!" 

WRONG!!!  that old feeling of needing more sugar, especially when distracted, bored or anxious has come back with a vengeance.  i am not eating anywhere near the amount of sugar in my diet as i did before paleo, but the fact that the cravings have returned have confirmed to me that it is an issue.  i was reading a blog post the other day that was written by a self-described sugar addict who has also gone paleo.  i finally felt i was not alone, that someone else out there understood what it felt like to be totally focused on finding something to satisfy that craving.  


so now what do i do?  at the moment, the thought of giving up conventionally made treats seems sad and impossible to me.  but then again, a year ago, the thought of losing over 40 lbs. seemed impossible.  i did it, although not  overnight.  i am not perfect,  i may not change overnight, but i want to be healthy.  so here i go again.  and one of the things that spurs me on is looking at these pictures:

                                                                 taken in november, 2010

                                                               taken in june, 2012


over 100 lbs. gone between the two of us.  we feel better, move easier, and sleep better.  so many benefits that make giving up unhealthy foods (like those containing sugar)  worthwhile.  


today is a new day.  i am in control of the choices i make.  i choose to be healthy!
                                                             

Here We Go Again . . .

so, it has been a couple of weeks since my last post.  in that amount of time i have pretty much stayed away from wheat and i have not had any soda pop.  i did make waffles using a bit (about a 1/2 cup) of spelt flour, and last weekend i made chocolate chip cookies using a cup of white wheat flour (the rest was coconut flour).  i was asked not to make them that way again!  over the past couple of weekends i  also had my beloved homemade hot cocoa, with whole milk AND whipped cream.  it was heavenly!   i have also indulged my craving for chocolate -- not just dark chocolate, but specifically M & M's. then last night, we went out to dinner at a favorite restaurant that we had not been to in years.   we had cheese fondue with chunks of bread and sausage.  for my entree, i had chicken jagerschnitzel (chicken breast that has been pounded thin and then breaded and sauteed.) with mashed potatoes and a sourdough roll. for dessert i had a bowl of sweetened strawberries with whipped cream.  over the past two weeks i did not keep track of calories, and my activity level has dropped.  i am still exercising and walking, but my seasonal part time job is done until august, and it is a very physical job that keeps me moving and standing most of the day.

as you can probably imagine, i am now seeing the consequences of my choices.  my stomach was unsettled a for a few days earlier this week.  i have been extra sleepy.  my hands are puffy and my tummy is bloated. and after last night's dinner, i could not sleep in bed -- i had to sleep sitting up on the couch because i was so full.  i was popping tums all evening.  the worst consequence of all is i have gained 8 lbs.  in 2 weeks.  in the month of april i lost a total of 11 lbs.  then i lost an additional 5 lbs at the beginning of may.  in the last 2 weeks, i have gained 8 lbs, and that is with skipping lunch now and then because i wasn't hungry.  i am upset that my sugar cravings came back. thankfully, i am still down a full 8 lbs. from where i started on apirl 1st, so i feel good about that.

what does this experience tell me?  first, i CANNOT be trusted around sweets!!!  not even 72% dark chocolate.  also, i am one of those people that must stay active to keep the weight off. and even after all this time, i apparently still cannot accurately judge how many calories i am eating without recording them.

so what happens now?  my husband and i have decided to do another 30 days of fairly restricted eating (he also gained weight in may, and he is way more active than me!)  our anniversary is this month, so we are giving ourselves permission to have anything we want for our anniversary dinner.  i will probably allow myself to go ahead and use butter instead of restricting myself to ghee, but other than that, i will again be avoiding dairy, sugar, legumes, wheat and other grains.  i will keep track of my calories most days.  i will increase my exercise.  most importantly, when the month of june is over,  i will NOT be giving myself permission to add unhealthy foods back into my diet.  i made a commitment to myself a year and a half ago that i would get healthy.  i keep saying to people, why would i want to eat any other way when eating paleo makes me feel so good? more than that, i feel WELL.  for so many years i have felt less than well.  eating "clean", eating "paleo", or whatever you want to call it, makes me feel well, and even if that is the only benefit (it's not the only benefit, trust me!) that makes it worthwhile.  i say again, when i can eat healthy protein and fats, all the veggies i want and some fruit, lose weight and not be hungry doing it, why would i NOT want to embrace that lifestyle?

i am not perfect.  i stumble, i make mistakes, i do things that i know better than to do.  and yet, every day is an opportunity to start fresh, to learn from my mistakes, to take one step forward instead of two steps back.  that day for me is today.  starting fresh and giving myself permission to be healthy!